Big fish, little fish

Do you have someone in your life who drives you crazy?

Do you feel like you're going in circles?

Take heart. Others have it worse than you.........

End of a relationship

I ended a relationship today. We knew it had to end. The cost was too great. Although it ended with a hug, things had gotten strained.....especially my tendons.

Yes, today was the end of bootcamp with my personal trainer (Woot!!!!!). She was great and I love her, but there were moments I thought I was going to die!

I signed up for all of this... not out of vanity, but necessity. I was truly afraid one day I would no longer be able to move to get out of bed. Pretty well all the women I work with are menopausal (pity the one man among us!). We all ache and groan and compare notes as to how much sleep we got the night before. Our jobs are stationary at a computer all day.

In November I could stand it no longer. I determined that I was going to get my body moving and stop feeling like I'm 80 long before my time. Without any more thought, I joined the gym and agreed at the interview that I would need a trainer to help me. I particularly wanted to build bone and was afraid of hurting myself by just launching out without help. We settled on 13 lessons for the price of 12...no problem. I nearly fell off my chair of a heart attack when I heard the price. (What have I done!) At that point, I couldn't back out, so this would just have to be my Christmas present to myself....and birthday present, and next year's Christmas present...and so on.

I remember the feeling after my first session. I went to my car and sat. I wasn't sure I could raise my arms to the steering wheel. Every ounce of energy was drained from me. I was a zombie in an empty shell. But I knew I was doing the right thing. Each session was that much harder. The trainer worked each muscle until fatigued - completely fatigued. And then there was the mini-marathon in the training room which was gruelling to say the least. Running, jumping, skipping, push ups, crunches = agony. I longed for the end...put me out of my misery!

After today, I am on my own. I have done stuff I would never have tackled by myself and have surprised myself at what I am capable of doing if I push myself. The trainer has taught me how to keep going when I want to give up...to always drive for just a little more...a little harder...a little better. It will not always be easy to stay motivated, and there are things I'd much rather be doing, but it feels so good afterwards to have disciplined myself and kept my eye on the goal.

[Of course, you know I can 'spiritualize' all this (don't I always?). Are we so motivated to serve Christ, that we give it all of our effort ....drive a little harder....eyes on the goal? Do we have a mentor....a 'personal trainer' from whom we willingly accept words of correction when they see us falter, and words of encouragement that prod us to do better?]

I have a VERY long way to go. But it has amazed me just how much you can do that you never believed you could, when it becomes important to you. Perhaps desperation is the key. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm off to have a large piece of cheesecake (kidding!!!)

"Exercise daily in God—no spiritual flabbiness, please! Workouts in the gymnasium are useful, but a disciplined life in God is far more so, making you fit both today and forever. You can count on this. Take it to heart. This is why we've thrown ourselves into this venture so totally. We're banking on the living God, Savior of all men and women, especially believers."

From The Message Bible, I Timothy 4:8-10

Not My Job

By now I'm sure most frequent users of the internet have seen this popular 'Not My Job' picture. Gross....but makes the point. (Can't you just smell the fumes?!)

This picture came to my mind as I was pondering a few things....and not because we now have a possum lurking around our house (shudder!!!).

It's just that we are all travelling a 'road' and we all have those who follow us.

Too many of us (myself included) really don't care at times about the sloppy job we do by example and what we're leaving on the road for those coming up behind. And it stinks.

We're selfish by nature. So at times we do what we please or what feels good without regard for the consequences. We leave a mess...for someone else to step over or clean up and we just don't care. We leave a sloppy example of how not to do it and too often we feel no remorse or need to turn back, make restoration, and continue down the road without making the same mess again.

In case you hadn't noticed, this attitude seems more prevalent these days. NOT MY JOB to be loyal to my wife or husband, family, girlfriend or boyfriend. NOT MY JOB to protect and regard them with dignity, building them up and thinking of them more highly than myself. NOT MY JOB to care about my neighbour and encourage others. NOT MY JOB to look after the poor. I just want to live in MY world, with MY friends, and MY interests. It's all about ME and I don't think I'm really hurting anyone. Funny thing is, this ME stuff actually makes us miserable because we're never satisfied! One day it just might be ME that has to go all the way back to where I messed up, get down on my knees and scrape up the dead stinking possom (gag!), straighten the lines in the road, and begin the journey again.

Oh, we all mess up (especially ME!). And we all need mercy and grace for our screwups (especially ME!). Jesus always took notice of the heart of the humble one - the one who acknowledged he screwed up and needed His forgiveness, and truly wanted to be changed. I guess He knew that down the road, it was the one with the remorseful, willing, servant heart who'd really be getting somewhere....devoted....and joyful in the journey.

"...Look what I've done I've ruined it for everyone

I should've held on harder to my innocence...
I...I'm starting over I...I'm starting over
It's never too late.. It's never too late.. For starting over ..."

Starting Over, By Audio Adrenaline

Blessings in the bathtub

Rearranged some pictures in my bathroom today. Moved my favorite plaque to a spot above the bathtub.

Now,

every day I shower

and

every day I'm reminded

that....

...to unwrap

...to be grateful

...to be faithful

"...I want to sign Your name to the end of this day Knowing that my heart was true..."

Lifesong, by Casting Crowns

A profitable addiction! (and cure for boredom)

This evening I stumbled upon a website that I'm sure will become an addiction for me....no it's not Facebook! Far better.... because the more you become addicted, the more you provide rice for hungry people.

FreeRice was established on October 7, 2007 and has two goals as stated on their website: To provide English vocabulary to everyone for free; and to help end world hunger by providing rice to hungry people for free through the United Nations' World Food Programme.

Not convinced? I always check urban legend type stuff out at http://www.snopes.com/ to determine their validity....and this one is true.

Intrigued? Check it out. Even if you never liked English in school, you'll be hooked. It's free. It's simple. Wrong answers don't matter. You learn as you go, and each of your correct answers add up to another 20 grains of donated rice. Win/win. People helped. Boredom cured.

Disclaimer: May cause addiction.

Click here:

Christmas visitor

I love all God's creatures....sort of....but this visitor to our front porch on Christmas night is a stretch for me to....admire.

I thought I'd met all the city-dwelling critters around our place, so this possum was unexpected. He is much larger and fatter than a cat, more like a small raccoon...but ratlike. MUCH too ratlike. SHUDDER!

To make it worse, he not only ignored the bright porch lights, the frantic dog, and the camera flash on the other side of the window, he actually came up to the window ledge, stood on his hind legs and peered in the window at us! That was downright freaky. Wonder if he unlocks doors?! He really just wanted us to replace the garbage bag full of delectible Christmas leftovers that he had ripped open in that spot just before my husband discovered the mess. So much for the raccoon theory.

I have only ever seen dead possums on the road (or at least they're pretending to be dead...you know they get up later and walk away), and the REALLY dead ones are very dastardly looking. According to my internet research, they hang in trees by their tails and can have a gazillion babies. I admit I was drawn to watching this guy as he lumbered around, not the least bit bothered by us. I suppose I could have stepped out for a really good closeup instead of these poor shots...but, nah.

You know if I'd ditch the birdseed I'd quit getting these visitors I'm sure, but that won't be happening. So after dark now I will be stepping gingerly, with eyes surveying carefully ....and with camera at hand.

Just to know

Sometimes it's a good thing to have just enough light for the next step. If light was shed on everything that we would face in 2008, we might not be willing to step out at all. Perhaps that sounds pessimistic or discouraging, but it is simply the truth.

I attended a funeral just before Christmas, and expect to visit funeral homes twice this week. In 2007 these families did not expect that they would face the death of a loved one before year's end.

Many never knew they would battle serious illnesses this past year. It was always someone else's story. In 2007 it became their own.

Who could have seen a breakup of a family coming in 2007. Could children have fathomed their father, sadly struggling with depression, suddenly moving thousands of miles away from home with little hope of being with him again even rarely, when they were so used to him being a part of their daily activities? How do they sort out their confused emotions when they (the children) love their Dad but know adultery is wrong, but he (the adult) acts like it's okay to walk away from his marriage vow with their mother in order to be with someone else? Who would have seen such a tragedy coming?

Do death, illness, separation, and a myriad of other sad things discourage and disappoint me? Yes. It hurts. It's not fair. It's wrong. But there's a word that has been ringing in my head all through the Christmas season. I got an e-mail in December from an out of town co-worker in which he thanked me for catching an oversight on his part that would have caused hardship for an individual if not caught. He said, 'Thanks Lyn, you're a saviour'. I quickly replied, 'Not quite....we celebrate him on the 25th :-)'. I thought of 'saviour' as a rather uncommon word except in the 'religious' world. From that moment on I couldn't keep the word from my thoughts. The phrase in Silent Night kept repeating over and over...."Christ the SAVIOUR is born...Christ the SAVIOUR is born." It reminded me of hope. It spurred me to do things for others. He came....willingly....to help us. He's the remedy!

Good thing I'm not God, because I wouldn't have bothered coming. Too much pain to endure for all those who would just cast the sacrifice aside, do what they want, and not care. But He sees something in us that to him was worth the price. I don't really get it. But I know I need him. In all the heartache a year can bring, he is there....even on the other side of death.....saving, helping. A saviour rescues and delivers. Just to know he is there for me is enough light for today and gives hope and anticipation for the future.

"Just to know that I can come and
Lay at Your feet
Just to know that I won’t be denied
Just to know that I can call You my “Home”
Just to know….

Just to know all my hopes rest in Your heart
Just to know You won’t forget
Just to know that I am on Your mind
Just to know….

Just to know that You are always near
Just to know all Your promises
Will stay, right here.

Just to know that I won’t be alone
Just to know that You can hold me
Just to know in You I find my home
Just to know,
Just to know."

'Just to Know'

Written by Rita Springer and David Ruis

Found on Rita's album entitled "Effortless"