Where are my glasses????

My all-time favourite comic strip is ZITS - I check it daily. My favorite is Jeremy looking at his dad who clearly has 5 pairs of glasses on his head and asking "Where are my glasses??". Meanwhile, his mother's purse is slung over her shoulders and she's desperately asking, "Has anyone seen my purse??". Jeremy shakes his head and mumbles that he couldn't WRITE stuff like this. I have vivid memories of feeling like Jeremy the teenager in this comic when I was his age, but now....I'm afraid of becoming like my parents. Where DID I put my coffee cup??

It's too funny. And the older I get, the more scary it is that we have moments when things are right there in front of our eyes and we don't see them. Now I don't mean to get all spiritual about a comic strip, but on the other hand.....my previous sentence could be a rather profound statement in the world of faith. Follow me for a minute. The existence of God can neither be proved nor disproved. Faith is as much required by an atheist, as a believer in God. (In my humble opinion, an atheist needs much, much more faith). But I just happen to be convinced that the 5 pairs of reading glasses are right there on the head...and the purse is right there slung around the shoulders...but we don't see....Him....the Creator.

So why does one person not see Him at all, and yet I see Him in everything? (That is not meant as a criticism - it is simply a statement).

I purchase fresh flowers every two weeks for my home because I am astounded by every petal and stamen and colour of a beautifully created living thing.

I put out bird seed daily to watch amazing creatures that rival any airplane fly about and live in the incredible order of nature.

I see the complex nature of the soil and insects and plants and seeds and bulbs in my gardens, as the seasons turn...always without fail.

The stars and planets, sun and moon - all perfectly placed to allow our existence.

I simply have to think and read about the awesome DNA and complete orderly systems that run and recharge themselves within my own body to be humbly awestruck by the Creator.

You could write libraries to fill the universe on all of these amazing 'creations'.

I cannot muster enough faith - not even the size of a mustard seed - to ever believe it just happened - no matter how many gazillion years you give it to have evolved.....from nothing. I see a Designer everywhere I look.....while others ask, "Has anyone seen God around here?"

Do I always 'feel' Him? Nope. Do I always 'hear' Him? Nope.

There have been times in my life when I have gone through depression and felt absolutely no emotion towards anything. Nothingness. Horrible nothingness. For a very long time.

Did I still trust God? Absolutely.

At those times in my life I would wake up feeling sick and couldn't even face the day, so I reached for my Bible before my feet hit the ground, immersed myself in it - and chose to believe that God was still there in the nothingness, caring for me. The description of His never changing character and unconditional love held me. I felt nothing, but trusted.

And that is what I believe God looks for from us....sometimes even tests it in us.

Trust.... in the moments we don't feel, hear or see Him. Faith.

Is that stupid? Is it a crutch? Is it just psychological?

You are welcome to believe that. But apparently we need to be like little children, with childlike faith - not like rocket scientists. Oh, we don't throw our brains out the window...but there will always be stuff we have no answers for. Like the child who just trusts Dad, even when he doesn't understand everything yet.

The thing that cements it for me is the person of Christ.

The story is that God himself became one of us in the person of Christ, laid His life flat out for me whether I cared or not, when He didn't have to.

That act of mysterious, unrivalled love provided me with the chance to know Him and be with Him when I'm done with this life. That event in history that we are soon to celebrate, screams really loudly to me that He's here. Reeeeeeeeally loudly. In fact, that event provides all the proof and assurance I need that God is alive and well. He gave all that He had, and all that He could. The rest is up to me.

I don't think He really needs to prove anything else to me. Do I believe He is the Saviour or do I walk away?

There's a wonderful mystery in humbling myself and trusting Christ. It's no longer a decision my mind has made....it becomes deeply spiritual. As I respond in love and profound gratitude to Him, His Spirit brings His words alive. The Bible that could otherwise be a history or theological book to me, now has life within its pages and it changes me as I respond. Christ refers to Himself as the bride of His church. Would we ever marry someone to only have an intellectual relationship with? No. It moves from the mind to the heart and into the spirit. His love and care for me is personal. I'm forgiven and I'm loved by the One who knows me.

He could choose to send angels or things to 'convince' me that He's real - but then I would not need faith, nor would I respond with a heartfelt love.

He could have made me a robot to force a response to Him, but I believe He gave Himself completely to win me, and now He yearns for a willing, loving, trusting response in return. Then it is truly a deep, loving, spiritual bond between us. It's the trusting that seems to invoke His response to me.

The more years I live, the more I really do see Him in everything, hear Him in my spirit and know that His Spirit lives in me. I can't possibly be convinced otherwise.

It has nothing to do with how I feel or the circumstances in my life. It's more than can be understood or figured out with the mind - my heart and spirit is engaged.

At times, it's overwhelming that I'm allowed to live in this place. Who can understand that God would want anything to do with me? It's beyond comprehension.

It's called joy - even when I'm not happy. It holds me during the rough times when the faith gets tested again. Should I ever plunge again into the darkness of depression, He will still hold me.

I read an article by Dale Fincher who told of an encounter with a dying man who pointed to the sea at sunset and asked "Where's God?" Funny how one can look at a sunset and ask that, while others are overwhelmed and see Him everywhere in the beautiful painted sky. What do you see? I'm going to have a look at that comic strip again. Question to self: In the light of what I've just rambled about.....which generation do I now think I identify with?

Addendum: I drafted most of this blog Saturday night. Sunday morning I was driving to church alone as my husband was called in to work. The song below (What Can I Do, by Paul Baloche) kicked in on our CD player and simply voiced all I was trying to say above. I cranked it and drove through misty eyes to church. To some, it's just a song. To millions who truly know their Saviour, it's a hearts cry. Listen with your heart....